Just for fun

Technology has given us many ways to connect to people across borders and distances, but in a rather absurd incident it let to disconnect of relations, maybe for life. The Times of India today, features and article where husband in a couple hailing from Qatar, typed 'Talaq' thrice while chatting with her on Skype. He claims to meant it as a joke, but I guess the joke didn't turn out to be very funny. According to the law now the wife has to wait for a period of 90 days called the Iddah to remarry. Post which she cannot remarry the same person, and in case she wishes to marry the same person she must marry someone else, divorce him, wait for a period of 90 days and the only she can remarry the first husband.

Long process isn't it? In the midst of all this has anyone every wondered how derogatory it is for the woman. She is merely treated like a commodity. Has anyone ever asked her what trauma and pain she goes through in this? Referring back to the article, the husband insists that it was purely a joke and was not meant seriously. A film made in 1982 in Bollywood called 'Nikah' truly depicts the feelings of a woman in an Islamic marriage.

Coming from a country like India which has an exhaustive list of women heading multinational companies, we also see women being treated as nothing but a mere puppet in the hands of their husbands. The husbands may never wake up from the slumber, but the wifes, its now or never.

Name your price..

"Karmanye Vadhikaraste Ma Phaleshu Kadachana, 

Ma Karma Phala Hetur Bhurmatey Sangostva Akarmani !"

This is a shloka ( verse) from the Bhagwad Gita that is often considered the essence of the Holy Book and of the philosophical and spiritual foundation of the Hindu way of life. This Sanskrit shloka is usually translated into Hindi as 'karm kar, phal ki icha mat kar' or 'carry out your duty, don’t worry (or care?) about the result.' 



I am a sincere believer of existence of god, and I often pray at the temples, mosques and gurudwara. It must be pure and selfless love for the existence of the almighty. Recently, for my birthday I wanted to sponsor a Langar,which is basically offering food to the deity and then feeding it to the masses. Since I am a believer of the Sai Baba so decided to keep one at the Sai Baba Temple. My family has been organizing similar Langars before, but this time it just didn't feel right. The feeling I got from the people working at the temple, was very artificial. Getting a chance to serve in the temple is an honour. But that is hardly the feeling that I could gauge from the people working there. All they were looking for was how much would they be tipped after the offering was done.So is it really about the belief or is this a profession in itself?

Around two years back, I went for a pilgrimage to Tirupati Balaji, down south of India. He is known to be the richest god in world, considering the amount of money and gold people donate. Everything these days comes with a price tag, so my visit as well. In short, just to skip the line which takes hours to an end, you can choose to pay Rs. 500, Rs. 1000 or Rs.1500 to see the deity and pray. What about the common man who stands in the line from a day before so that he gets his chance to pray to his god. In today's world everything is commercialized.

I come back to the verse from Bhagwad Gita which means carry your duty and don't worry about the result. The man who is dedicated to his work and family and has the love of god is the true worshiper. He need not visit the god in the temple for the god resides in his heart. Maybe its time we stop putting a money worth to everything, including belief!

Welfare for Nature and Men!

A society for crafts and craftspeople Dastkar, is a registered society that aims at improving the economic status of craftspeople, thereby promoting the survival of traditional crafts. It was founded in 1981 by six women, who had worked in the craft and development sector including Laila Tyabji, who is the current Chairperson.
What better way to spend your day on a Saturday afternoon than attending the Nature Bazaar organised by Dastkar at the Indira Gandhi Center for Arts. This is an initiative to improve the economic status of the small town workers and also to preserve the traditional handicrafts of each state. Most of the commodities put up at this exhibition is environment friendly and made with waste or natural resources. So when I reached there, it was a difficult task to find a parking slot for the car. But, in my opinion its a very good sign, because obviously it is something that people are appreciating.


There we stalls from various states ranging from Uttrakhand to Kutch. And the beauty of the handicrafts cannot be captured in words. The raw silk sarees and the Himachal shawls were the one of the sure shot hit with people. The pottery and the clay kept the kids occupied. My personal favourite was stall called 'Haathi Chaap' which is paper made from elephant dung. In spite of the base ingredient sounding gross, the stuff is actually very good. It includes dairies that can be gifted, coasters etc... The other stalls had jute bags, kantha work sarees, bangles made with beads, blocks for block printing and home decorations. 


The best part was yet to come, and for me that is food, food and more food. So the food stalls included delicacies from Kerela, Tamil Nadu, Rajasthan and Hyderabad. The Dal Bati Choorma from Rajasthan which is a wheat dumpling served with lentils gave a tough competition to the Kathi Roll form Hyderabad which was loaded with egg and chicken. The conclusion, I loved them both. Finished it with a filter coffee from the Kerela stall and some Kulfi as dessert.



All in all it was a good day spent considering I was also supporting a welfare activity. Just an advice, the strata of the society that normally attends such fairs, is upper middle to higher class. Hence the prices of the goods are not very cheap. But I guess tax is not levied on just going and having a good day, right?

Thought over food

" I will not have more pooris ma," I commented this morning. There was Ashtami Pooja at home, post the holy occasion of Navratras for Hindus. I was craving the Halwa and Poori, especially after fasting for a week. It was a beautiful sight to see those tiny pooris puff up in a pool of clarified butter and the warm aroma of halwa with hints of saffron and cardamom. I was in food paradise.

Food has been known to affect moods and reactions of people after consumption, which may be immediate of over a period of time. Research by Judith Wurtman, a professor at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT), has focused on how certain foods alter one's mood by influencing the level of certain brain chemicals called neurotransmitters. It has always been said that a heavy lunch makes one very lethargic, or eating fruits will keep you feeling light and energetic; this is the case when a heavy meal makes the stomach work more and hence requires more blood and leads to less blood supply to the brain. All this scientific explanation is good, but all I know is chocolate is my happy food, it makes me feel better on a gloomy day, and guess what, the studies agree with me. Chocolate releases Endorphins which help pep up the moods.

Food holds the greatest meaning at my household. You get up to chole bhature, move on to a pre lunch snack of idli and chutney that nani ( grandmother) sent, have a lunch of dal, roti, vegetables and rice, evening tea with bhel puri and dinner with butter chicken and naan. Wouldn't you call it love for food? 

Don't know if food really affect moods, but the food with love, does manage to satisfy the soul.

A Ray of Hope

Aisha, does the name strike a chord in your minds? I'm not particularly referring to Aisha the film based loosely on Jane Austen's novel, Emma. The Aisha in this context was the 18 year old Afghan girl, who featured on the cover of the TIME magazine in the August issue. Her nose and ears were chopped off by her brutal husband because she tried to run away from the oppression. This in the Pashtun society is a punishment that is given to the wife who disgraces her husband.

So this girl is in news this time because of the brand new prosthetic nose surgery, with a newer look and a much improved self confidence. Soon enough the doctors will give her a more permanent solution, a step ahead of the plastic surgery. And believe me I do feel very happy for her as she has been granted a new life. But to me, it seems more like another attempt of US to showcase that they are the Global Rescuer. It is good that the life of this still teenager has been granted back to her buffed & polished, but such issues occur everyday, around the streets of Afghanistan. When we refer to the atrocities against women, the buck just does not stop here. I would not say it is about just a girl in Afghanistan, but what about the thousands of women die in India for dowry or refusal to marry?  If the laws of the Pashtun society sound absurd, the local superstitions beliefs of the people in a village in Jharkhkand, India don't seem any wiser by parading women naked and making them eat human excreta on the pretext of calling them 'possessed'. 


The idea here is not to change a society or the norms, it is just about waking up and smelling the coffee!

A world less traveled?

Sitting in the first week of October'2010, the Commonwealth Games kick started pretty well. Anticipating the traffic jams and other restrictions, I decided to take a mini vacation to Bangkok and Pattaya. And oh boy! I did not think that I would be running away from one set of crowd and land straight to another one.

Reaching the airport, I see a long queue of people, and guess what? They all were traveling to Thailand. Wow, that was not the most interesting piece of news. Though it did seem like a Deja Vu, and now I know why. I remembered a reading a comment in a newspaper by Ketaki Behl, Director of Indraprastha Travels

"Most of the people, even corporates, are heading towards Europe or south-east Asia, particularly Bangkok during the Commonwealth break"

This was not good, I was running away from the crowd for some relaxation, and here I meet more crowd alas!. If that was not enough, the flight seemed like a modified zoo with kids running around and their mothers yelling  'Ae susant, skirt wali aunty se thora campa cola la na' ( literally translating to please get coke from the lady in the skirt = air hostess). So after all this I had my fingers crossed for a good trip ahead.

The feel of Pattaya was good, because I am a beach baby. But I did pretty much feel at home with all the Indians around. When I excitedly land up a the Coral Island, I head a voice which is familiar, that was of my neighbour, Deepa Aunty. Was I thrilled, irritated or just numb was a question I repeatedly asked myself. Well can I safely say that the world is a small place after all? Now good, bad or just fine, phoren  trip was accomplished right? The dreams of the relaxation were shattered soon enough.